October Tribute III

The triad of October birthdays in my family culminates today with my mother's. Before my two youngest sisters were born I always felt like the odd one out, with my birthday falling in July, and the rest of my family all celebrating in October. That feeling dissipated after Lexie and Sabrina were born. Still, October is a special month in my family, and today on the 25th I will pay my respect to my favorite woman in the universe: My mother.

It is difficult to begin writing about my mother. It's not that I don't have the words to describe her, but rather, I don't know where to begin. I feel as if I know my mother better than I know anyone else, yet because of this, it feels like an arduous task in putting her into words. I feel that language fails me right now, because even though my mother is a beautiful, caring, nurturing, fascinating, and warmhearted woman, these adjectives only reveal a fraction of who she truly is, and in order to know her and appreciate her, you must talk to her, interact with her, be taught by her, live under her roof, and sit down to one of her home cooked meals. It is then when you can begin to understand the magnitude and depth of her amazing character.

My mother is part of the reason why I am teaching here in Hong Kong. Undoubtedly, she would prefer if I was closer to her, and if I had to be teaching in another country she would opt for anywhere that requires less than 6 hours in the air to reach. However, my mother was a teacher, and when that early occupational choice came to a thudding halt back in 1978, she decided to change her profession. She went from teaching Catholic school children to opening up her own business specializing in antique jewelry and vintage clothing. She started off small, opening a tiny boutique in the basement of our house. And while she was planting the seeds for her future endeavors, she took the time to dedicate herself to teaching her newborn student.

One of my earliest memories of my mother was when I was a few years old. I used to sit across from her at the kitchen table or somewhere on the floor and she would hold up flashcards with words on them. I would say "table," "bedroom," and "grandmother," and she would smile at me and go through the deck a couple more times. My mother tells two great stories incorporating the wisdom she imparted upon me as a child. One involves me reading the Wall Street Journal when I was 2 years old, which is something I find funny on multiple fronts, especially since the only other time I ever picked up that particular newspaper was during Journalism class at KU. The second occured in kindergarten, where, at the end of the first week, my teacher pulled my mother aside and asked her if she was aware that I was reading at a 12th grade level, to which my mother replied, "Yes, I was waiting to see how long it took you to figure it out."

Because of my mother, I have been reading voraciously for as long as I can recall. Anything and everything I could get my hands on, I would tackle with youthful earnestness: Animal encyclopedias, The Hardy Boys mysteries, baseball card price guides, and video game magazines took up most of my youth. I would later graduate to classics like 20,000 Leagues Under The Sea, Robinson Crusoe, and Frankenstein, and eventually I would go to college and major in English Literature, for the simple reason that I loved to read all kinds of books.

In addition, one of my greatest aspirations is to publish at least one book. I have watched my mother writing books for over 20 years now. I remember her first rejection letter, and I noticed how afterwards, she would try even harder to make sure her vision was realized. And my mother does exactly that. She realizes her vision, no matter how impossible or grand it may seem. She is constantly trying to reinvent herself, stay ahead of trends, and keep focused on her work. She has owned and operated one of the largest stores of its kind for the last 20 years while simultaneously publishing almost 20 books. On top of this she is employed on a full-time basis as both mother and Ettinger Estate museum curator. Her devotion, dedication, and passion are an inspiration to me.

I have no problem admitting that I am a "Momma's Boy." I would do anything for my mother, for I feel that she is the sweetest, gentlest, most loving and compassionate person ever. When she told me to never smoke a cigarette, I listened. When she told me to treat people with respect, I listened. When I am feeling depressed or slightly off, she will pick up on it instantly, and do her best to right my wrongs. My mother has been my mentor, guide, confidante, and coffee buddy, among other things. More importantly, she has been the best mother I could ever ask for. And I know that is the one job that she takes the most pride in.

Happy Birthday Mom! I am extremely proud of you and everything you stand for. You have shaped me into the person I am today, and for that, I am eternally grateful.

I love you!